Food = Dilemma

I decided to be a vegetarian (consuming fish and diary) about two years ago, when I moved to states I figured how different meat tastes comparing to Turkey. At the time, I also had a bias to be a vegetarian. As a child I never really consumed meat and diary products willingly. When I was five I witnessed a sacrifice and since that day my parents forced me to eat animal products. My dad prepared milks professionally mixed with egg and honey in the mornings until one day I discovered the cracked eggs at the kitchen trash. I have always been criticized to be a picky eater, my mum spend more time at kitchen because of me, and I guess my parents still feel frustrated (mainly concerned) about my eating habits. So I had to carry my picky eater guilt all around for years now.

After I moved to States, I was finally felling free to eat what I actually wanted. Ohh the land of freedom, I simply love this piece of land... But this time my subconscious was bothering me and kept telling me "you should consume protein!" and after 8 months of struggle between my picky and responsible self I decided to quit eating red meat (never consumed pork due to religious reasons), and chicken. And end up eating pasta or salad almost always:)

However, after two years my responsible self emerged and now she is telling me my memory skills is not as good as it was two years ago. And guess what, she is telling the truth. I don't know if it is related with my eating habits, or some other reason (e.g. ageing), but my memory is not as good as it used to be.

Considering this I decided to visit the Fish House at victoria park road in the rainy Sunday. Btw about 8 months ago i also gave up eggs and fish. So I went there and ordered the catch of the day(i cant remember the name of the fish now:( ). And there it was poor fish grilled, battered with olive oil, fleshy, juicy, served with roasted potatoes, baby tomatoes, garlic. I do adore cooking, i think its an art and I consumed this piece of art end up enjoying mostly the vegetables:) Especially garlic tasted like candy to me. What's wrong with me? Am I a vegetarian or born to be vegetarian and forced to be a carnivore. My point is, food has always been a dilemma for me. I love eating, but I always get confused about what to eat. Maybe we shouldn't put ourselves strict rules and try to enjoy responsibly from what is good for our minds & bodies.

I found this talk after I finished with my post;